The Pre-Party Phone Calls and Texts
Didn’t you make a frittata last year?
No. Do you mean the quiches Lori and Linda brought?
No. Didn’t you bring a frittata? I thought you made a frittata. Wasn’t it a frittata?
No, it was the non-sausage roll—the pizza dough thing.
Oh, well we have enough bread with the French Toast casserole and the bagels.
–OK. I’ll bring some kind of egg thing. I’ll figure out something.
Well, we should have plenty of food for “the men.”
Yeah, I think we’ll have more than enough.
…No, don’t worry he’s bringing his own food. . .But your house might smell like fish.
Hey, it’s me. I was wondering about drinks. Should I get soda? We have wine. I don’t know. Give me a call.
Yeah, she called me from the liquor store. She sounded really stressed. She thought you wanted cranberry.
Don’t forget to put something under your French Toast before you put it in the oven. Remember last year? And all the smoke in the kitchen?
Oh yeah. I forgot.
You’re the grownup. Nothing can ever happen to you.
I love you.
What kind of bagels do you want?
I like any kind. Get whatever kind you like.
I like any kind too. . .it is all bread, which means good.
Can I have a bagel?
What are you drinking?
It’s the same as Mom’s, but with cranberry.
Oh, I think I need to try that.
Mom, can I have a bagel?
I love you, but don’t move. Don’t step backwards.
This one doesn’t have nuts. This one has nuts, but I think I screwed up the sauce. [Singing] Happy Holidays. . .
Can I have a bagel?
In a minute.
What do you have that I can nosh on?
I’ll make you a plate, Mom. Sit down.
I DID put salad dressing on it.
–Well, I can’t find it.
Grandmom, I’ll put some more dressing on it. Do you want anything else?
Everything is delicious.
Yes, I still have this cough.
We have an elf. He watches us. My dad thinks he’s creepy, but I think he’s cute.
Conversations in corners.
Missing those who aren’t with us. Welcoming those joining our family for the first time.
Cuddling on the sofa.
Doggy kisses. Hugs all around.
The love of family.
More wine! More coffee! More food!
I’m stuffed. I might vomit.
Is it time to open presents?
I can’t get this open.
It’s your turn.
Oh. . .thank you.
I need another picture. Sammy, hold up your truck like this.
Wait, get a picture of this.
Oh, could you get a picture?
Am I taking too many pictures?
No, don’t take my picture.
Can I open my last present? I’m bored. I’m going down to the basement for the rest of the afternoon.
Yeah, we’re channeling Martha Stewart.
Sorry, it seems so disorganized. Is it more disorganized this year?
–No, it’s always like this.
Oh. It is?
Who wants coffee?
Are we having dessert?
Oh. . . the pie’s really not sweet enough. . .
Mr. Penguin has his picture on our family wall.
Yeah, so I’m going to this reunion. There’s a Facebook war going on. The woman is CRAZY!
You look smokin’ hot in those boots.
I don’t think I can walk in them.
Really, even if you only wear them in bed. . .
Oh, look, it’s starting to snow. I guess we should pack up and get ready to go.
Thank you for having us.
I’ll call you.
Mr. Penguin wants to give you a hug!
Wishing all of you hugs, the love and craziness of family and friends, and just a touch of magic during this holiday season. And chocolate, of course.
Thanks for reading!