The Robin Sang the Light

800px-American_Robin_KSC01pp1005

“Seen on KSC grounds, a robin pauses in a Brazilian pepper tree filled with red berries.” NASA, via Wikipedia Commons, Public domain

 

The robin sang the light

“Get up, come play,” said he,

“away the dream-filled night,

up here, you will be free.”

 

“Get up, come play,” said he,

but the mossy limbs were high.

Up here, you will be free.

No, I cannot fly.

 

But the mossy limbs were high

and shadowed in the dawn.

No, I cannot fly,

I stood upon the lawn.

 

And shadowed in the dawn

was nature sweet and wild,

I stood upon the lawn,

I listened, and I smiled.

 

Was nature sweet and wild?

(Away the dream-filled night!)

I listened, and I smiled–

the robin sang the light.

 

Another pantoum for dVerse. Yes, this is what I’m doing instead of all the work I have to do. Don’t judge me till you try it. 🙂 Gina is hosting this forms challenge. She explains the history and how to write one. Come join us!

This pantoum is a revision of the first pantoum I wrote–for one of Jane Dougherty’s challenges.

 

 

 

58 thoughts on “The Robin Sang the Light

  1. I’ve just read Kerfe’s, a revision of her first ever pantoum, and like this, the rhythm is perfect. I love it when a poem sings like a song, and this one is lovely! I discovered that your robin is a thrush, like our blackbird. I bet the song is similar.

  2. very lovely Merril, the pantoum not only sings but dances its way to my heart. the dialog between Robin’s tiny feelings and the wide world you have captured so well in the short pretty lines. very original and light.

  3. A gorgeous robin Pantoum, Merril! I especially love these lines:
    ‘And shadowed in the dawn
    was nature sweet and wild,
    I stood upon the lawn,
    I listened, and I smiled.’
    I agree with Imelda about its child-like quality.

  4. This reminds of an encounter I had with a robin here one day. I love the antics and sounds of the birds in the area, not least the robin. The form sounded like a song any of the birds would sing, with the repetitive sounds they make.

  5. I love so much about this….the conversation, connection with nature, the invitation to fly and the way you turned “was nature sweet and wild” into a question in the last stanza, manipulating the line into a new perspective. Top this off with a beautiful rhythm. So glad I dropped in to read!

Leave a Reply

Please log in using one of these methods to post your comment:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google photo

You are commenting using your Google account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.