Recall Your Dreams

Sunrise at the end of December ©️Merril D. Smith 2020

I am after beauty–
searching for it, an old friend
who vanished, but returned

~in the glorious pink of dawn~

the moon sings farewell
as she sets over the blue river,
and a heron soars white

~in a soft wind-whisper~

I hear life,
in shadowed language, full of ifs,
it murmurs,

~recall ~

your dreams,
the scent of summer rain,
the light after the storm clouds part.

It’s been quite a year, hasn’t it? And it may get worse before it gets better. But I decided to consult the Oracle, and she’s given a hopeful message. Happy New Year to all of you!
(This started as a Puente, but it just kept going, sort of like this year.)

Connections

Monday Morning Musings:

as_janus_rostrum_okretu_ciach

 

“Isn’t it nice to think that tomorrow is a new day with no mistakes in it yet?”

–L.M. Montgomery, Anne of Green Gables

“For last year’s words belong to last year’s language
And next year’s words await another voice.”

–T.S. Eliot, “Little Gidding”

“Not knowing when the dawn will come
I open every door.”

–Emily Dickinson

“Some people build fences to keep people out, and other people build fences to keep people in.”

August Wilson, Fences

Snap!

Thumb and finger strike,

connection made.

Snap!

Synapses fire,

memories triggered.

Snap!

Fingers, feet

feel the beat

New York streets

When you’re a Jet

You’re a Jet all the way

My sister and I listen to the album,

vinyl disk spins,

we watch the movie,

only later do I learn it is

Romeo and Juliet, updated,

and that famous play,

with its star-crossed lovers,

is based on older stories,

tales as old as time,

that connect us with the past.

 

So many movies, so little time before the old year ends,

we see Fences,

(powerful performances),

the sins of the father visited on the son

generation after generation,

connections through pain and history.

I dislike Troy more and more as the movie goes on,

while recognizing the source of his suffering,

and feeling sorry for him

and Rose and the children.

 

I ask my husband afterward

if he thinks he would have been a different father

if we had had sons instead of daughters.

He says yes, he thinks so,

that he would have been harder and stricter

like his father

who was a good man, but stern,

I was scared of him when I first knew him,

and amazed the first time I saw him laughing with his brother.

My father-in-law was so different with his grandchildren,

softer, gentler, singing Sesame Street songs.

I think of how he connected differently with his children

and his grandchildren,

the special bond he and my young nephew had.

 

On New Year’s Eve,

I think of people all over the world,

celebrating the new year.

I see photographs of fireworks,

Sydney and Hong Kong,

long before nightfall here.

We celebrate more quietly with a group of friends,

Chinese food dinner,

a tradition going back decades,

before and after children,

the where and how changing over time,

food and friendship

amidst the Christmas decorations and lights,

we discuss our families,

see photos of grandchildren,

and worry about what the election will bring.

Our friends talk of selling their houses and moving,

not because of the election,

but because we’re getting older

(but better, of course

with years of wisdom now)

we’re still us, though greyer and heavier

about our middles,

and we still connect

in the way of old friends,

with jokes, hugs, and glances that can reveal more than words.

 

One friend gives each of us—her sister-friends—

a bracelet,

matching bracelets,

I think of how bracelets

have been worn since ancient times,

good luck charms,

amulets for long life and happiness,

tokens of friendship.

charms linked to one another

connecting them

as we are connected through our bonds of friendship,

as words connect thoughts in a sentence,

expressing ideas and actions,

taking us into the new year and new worlds

describing our past, describing our future,

connecting them in clauses,

independent and dependent

as we are,

free to make choices,

to keep people out or keep them in,

but also, dependent on those around us

not to destroy our lives, our souls, our planet.

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New Year’s Eve, 2016. We are linked, heading into 2017.

 

We can build fences,

or walls,

but are we protecting or defending?

It’s a myth that the Great Wall of China can be seen from space,

but the lights of cities do glow like beacons,

lights connecting us in the dark,

connected like the water flowing from river to the sea,

the message in a bottle circling the globe,

Help! Find me. I’m lost.

The connection is made.

But, snap!

Who sent the message?

Is it too late to help?

 

The holidays are over, the clock strikes, we turn the page.

It’s a new dawn, with new words,

but still linked to the past like a bracelet.

Open the door,

peek over the fence,

Snap!

feel the beat,

move your feet,

dream of tales as old as time

and of now.

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I wish everyone a happy and peaceful new year. We may be in for quite a bit of turbulence on this journey through 2017. So buckle up! Have that wine and chocolate handy.  I appreciate all of you who read my posts, and I love the friendships and connections I’ve made here. Welcome to my new readers, too! I hope you’ll stick around to see what the new year brings here on Yesterday and Today.

 

 

 

 

 

Countdown to 2017: Tend the Fire

 

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Simon Vouet, “Father Time Overcome by Love, Hope, and Beauty,” [Public domain], via Wikimedia Commons

 

Toll the New Year’s bells,

sing, ring, out with the old,

tick tock, the Doomsday clock,

crash, boom, the bombers croon,

disaster looms,

resist, persist,

as midnight strikes,

what is and was

and what will be,

shadows still,

not foreordained.

Sing, ring, in with the new,

the bogus god,

jittery and twittery,

embodiment of hate and fear,

hollow crowned,

filled with vain conceit,

yet mortal.

 

From ashes, hope rises,

like the Phoenix,

even now,

(See the flames flicker?)

glimmering, gleaming,

in the darkness–

gather round,

the embers glow, the fire grows,

no dying of the light

but gently, delicately

feed the flame,

tend it carefully till the dawn.

 

 

 

 

 

 

Looking Forward and Looking Back

“Actually I prefer to see myself as the Janus, the two-faced god who is half Pollyanna and half Cassandra, warning of the future and perhaps living too much in the past—a combination of both.”

–Ray Bradbury

Many people make New Year’s Resolutions. I don’t.

However, this is a good time of year to reflect upon the past and think about the future.

On New Year’s Eve, my husband and I celebrated with friends we’ve known and celebrated with for decades. Decades! Did I really write that? We met one couple when we were all in college—over forty years ago. Yikes! How can that be true? We met the other couple shortly after we were married. A third couple could not join us this year because of a death in the family.

Old friends. We’ve been with each other for births, deaths, weddings, and funerals. We’ve seen parents die, and we’ve seen our children grow up. We’ve seen career changes and retirement. We’ve laughed and cried together. And we’ve celebrated.

Oh, those celebrations! They no longer involve copious amounts of alcohol (well, perhaps at the weddings), but there is always plenty of food, and usually chocolate, and often wine and beer. We may have given a name to the beverage dispenser that a friend uses to hold sangria. I can neither confirm nor deny this.

So on New Year’s Eve 2014, my husband and I celebrated with the two other couples. We missed our absent friends and mourned their loss. We ate takeout Chinese food (also our tradition for New Year’s Eve)—on China plates. We discovered that the locally produced spiced pear wine goes really well with it. We caught up on news. We talked of recent events and discussed our futures. We decided we should take notes of our conversation for our missing friends, but we didn’t actually do it. Sorry Pat and Tom. We also decided that if we did, there would have to be several asterisks and footnotes to explain some of the more . . .hmmm. . . . outrageous?  questionable? bizarre? statements. We checked the weather in Yaak, Montana. It’s cold there, in case you’re wondering. We shared our fortunes; we ate dessert (flourless chocolate cake and Christmas cookies). We drank more wine. One cat stayed close while we talked, laughed, and ate, but the other one hid. He is wise.

We suddenly realized that we had had so much fun talking around the table that the hours had passed without us realizing how late it was. It was nearly midnight. We turned on the TV to watch the ball drop in New York City and hugged and kissed when it reached it midnight. We heard fireworks exploding from nearby streets and from Philadelphia, across the river. Our friends left. Both cats reappeared, and then followed my husband and me to bed.

The next morning, New Year’s Day, I was up at the usual time, and then went to the gym. When I returned, I had a protein drink and called my mom to wish her happy New Year. Then I ate a Cinnabon while watching the Call the Midwife holiday special. . .because, after all, it was a holiday. It all balances out, don’t you think?

Some days you need to eat a big, gooey Cinnabon and curl up under a blanket with a cat on your lap. Especially after you’ve had only a few hours of sleep and a workout at the gym.

Life is made up of days at the gym and hard work. It is also made up of time spent reading a book or watching TV. Life includes salads and chocolate. It has love and heartbreak. All of these things go together to make us who we are.

Some days you need to reflect. Some days you need to celebrate. Some days you need to think about how lucky you are to have such great friends. Some days you just need to sit back and relax.

James Baldwin wrote:

Some days worry
some days glad
some days
more than make you mad.
Some days,
some days, more than shine:
when you see what’s coming
on down the line!
–from “Some Days” by James Baldwin

Wishing all of you few days of worry and a year filled with days that more than shine.

Here’s a beautiful version of Baldwin’s poem sung by the fabulous Audra McDonald

Laugh, Dream, and Celebrate

“Laughter is timeless, imagination has no age, and dreams are forever.”

–Walt Disney

 

About a week ago I woke up from a dream. It involved some sort of complicated story line that unfortunately I don’t remember—because I think it was probably a pretty fabulous story. Then again, maybe not. I do remember that in the dream I was trying unsuccessfully to get Google maps to work on a phone (which appeared to be covered in some thick yellowed plastic, like an old fashioned cellophane wrapper). I was not panicking or frustrated in the dream, merely trying to find my way.

 

I’m taking that as a metaphor of life.

 

Most of us struggle to find a path–or at least a clear set of directions–through the paths and by-ways of our lives.  And it’s best not to panic. Sometimes it’s even fun to meander, or take a brief tour into uncharted territory.

 

During this time of year, everywhere you turn, there are articles about New Year’s resolutions. Both ordinary people and celebrities give advice. Guess what? I don’t have any. My life is not your life, and who am I to presume to have answers?

 

In recent weeks, I’ve become somewhat overwhelmed by the many projects that I am working on—and that all seem to be due at the same time.  (Why DID I agree to write that book review, too? I guess I better read the book soon.) It’s hard to fit everything in, to be a good daughter, mother, wife, and friend—and to give equal time to physical and mental pursuits.

 

 So this is a reminder to myself—one step at a time. It will get done.

 

For over thirty years, my husband and I have celebrated New Year’s Eve with some dear friends.  Almost every year we’ve had Chinese food; sometimes take out, sometimes in a restaurant; sometimes with children, sometimes without.  When our children were small, we spent the night at our friends’ house, and then had brunch together the next morning. That started our tradition of New Year’s Day Cinnabons. (Yes, I’m a good baker, and I could bake my own cinnamon rolls, but that’s not the tradition! Remember how I like traditions?) 

 

So here is another reminder to myself—take time to remember and nourish (in both ways) friendships.

 

And here is probably the most important reminder—don’t forget to laugh every day, to have a bit of fun—and don’t forget to dream.  (OK. It’s also important to eat chocolate, but I don’t need a reminder for that, and you probably don’t either.)

 

I will do my part to give you a chuckle, as a New Year’s present. Here is one I just saw today. It’s from a collection of jokes sent in by scientists to the Guardian. I’m not a scientist, but I like it because it’s about books and typos—you have to admit, typos can be pretty funny.

 

A new monk shows up at a monastery where the monks spend their time making copies of ancient books. The new monk goes to the basement of the monastery saying he wants to make copies of the originals rather than of others’ copies so as to avoid duplicating errors they might have made. Several hours later the monks, wondering where their new friend is, find him crying in the basement. They ask him what is wrong and he says “the word is CELEBRATE, not CELIBATE!”

A Happy New Year to my family and friends—including those in the blogger world.  I hope you all find peace, love, and happiness in 2014.

Thanks for reading!

Merril/ Super Momma/Aspiring Queen of the Universe

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